When my daughter was 2, I kept her cups and bowls within reach. If she was hungry or thirsty, she’d just bring me one or the other and we’d go from there. My middle child was similar. Don’t get me wrong, they had rough stages – but not when they were two.
I’m here to tell you that the terrible two’s do in fact, exist. While I still believe that many children only act out due to the furies of communication, that is not the problem of my two year old. He knows how to ask for a banana, milk, and whatever else his heart desires. He knows how to say please, scale the wall so he can find his treat of choice (terrifying!) but what he does best is tattling, blaming the kids even if they’re not home, and enjoying a good old fashioned tantrum.
Crying at Christmas because his brother got power rangers and he didn't.
This guy can throw himself down on the ground with the best of them, if that doesn’t work, he’ll run into a room, slam the door and then crawl into the most awkward place that he can find. He hits, kicks, bites, screams, and for the life of me, I have no idea what to do about it. He’s also going through the ever glorious “MINE” phase at the moment. It was only a couple months ago that he’d share with the best of them, but once he hit that 2.5 age life changed.
So am I crazier for it? Probably, yes. I’ve tried ignoring, reprimanding, tiny two year old time outs. His hitting is pretty much geared towards me – so it could be much worse.
I have no idea why he’s making up for the lack of terrible two’s in the household – but here’s what I do know. His acting out isn’t tied in with lack of communication, but it’s tied in with the need for more attention. He’s the youngest of three, and my children are all back to back. I work from home, and when I’m not working I’m running the kids to and from school. When he gets extra playtime with mom, he’s happier and less likely to have an outburst.
So in short – terrible two’s can exist – and they can be brought on for various reasons. Just imagine being thrown into a culture and having so much to say and no way to say it. If you’ve got a little guy that has serious rage, try to really listen and figure out how to make life a little easier. Put things where they can reach them, teach them some words or signs so that they can easily communicate, and sometimes, just remember to unplug and hang out.
Obviously, if there are serious problems, talk to your pediatrician about it. Don’t just mark it off as ‘terrible two’s” and he’ll out grow it, because it might be something more than that.
